madam brussels - level 3 59 bourke street melbourne 9662 2775

you just know a place called madam something or other is going to be different from your average pick-up melbourne bar (for that, think pony or long room, yikes). and the history of madam brussels is interesting to say the least. but the first thing you notice is that it has grass indoors and many people seem to be reclining on garden furniture - again, indoors. if you do go to madam's place already pissed it's a bit disconcerting to walk along the indoor garden path and step onto the lawn. as if handling the drink is not fucking hard enough. if you do go in a sober state the difference can at least get the jaded bar-goer's attention.

but the hidden history of madam brussels dates back to the 1800s when madam brussels used to run brothels all around melbourne. apparently, many of the places were high-class (and a good thing too). we wouldn't want our current madam brussels to have come from the seedier ones. we want high class, erm, with and indoor garden. i'm sure there's a whole story behind it but i couldn't be fagged checking up on it. there is a roof-top garden and while winter is so fucking cold and the garden has a large degree of not funness about it, apparently it's awesome in summer and has a plunge pool so that you can cool off. and a lifeguard.

the view from the roof-top garden is spectacular. it's a view that most people don't see of melbourne unless you happen to live in one of the inner-city apartments. the city is not built up around that part of bourke street so you can see parliament house, the queen's theatre, down narrow lanes and some of the lit buildings that makes melbourne one of the greatest cities in the world.

oh, they have drinks, food, and blankets that you can take out to the roof-top garden so you can smoke yourself to death blah blah blah. i'll go back but probably not until it's warmer. did i say i hate the cold?

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